Wednesday, October 6, 2010

Two weeks wasn't enough time.

I thought two weeks off would be enough to alleviate the littlest of my aggravations. You know, the stupid stuff that only irritates me because people are so generally retarded. But I was wrong. I still want to slap people for the following:

"I need an iced tea." Really? Because I don't think 'need' means what you think it means.

"I'll take a salad." No, you'd like one. You're not taking anything, unless I bring it to you in the first place.

"Do you have a bathroom?" No.

"Is (random item) good?" How the fuck should I know? Do you like shrimp? Do you like spicy things? Do you like vegetables? Are you allergic to anything? Why don't you read the fucking menu item and make up your own mind?

"Would like you (some add-on, salad or whatever)?"
"Is it free?" Yes, because restaurants don't exist to make money!

Oddly "just water" isn't bugging me!


yellowcat said...

The "Is (random item) good?" question makes me want to punch somebody in the throat. Again, how the fuck should I know? I like it, but you may not and then you'll blame me and get a free meal. You'll probably also toss in that I was rude, so why don't you just read the menu and go fuck yourself.

Cindy said...

When I worked in a Restaurant/Gas station in the middle of nowhere along a main highway we would get the "do you have a bathroom" question all the time. Occasionally we said no, just so we could see the look of panic cross their face.

Waiting said...

What about:

Do you know where the restroom is?

- No, I've only worked here for 3 years and I've just been holding it.

What do you like to eat?

- You answer and they reply "that doesn't sound like something I would like."

Are your refills free?

- while this is a valid question it implies that you are going to need one every 45 seconds

You only brought one check???

- this happens to me often, two couples are disgusted by the fact that I assumed they wanted one check because no one said otherwise. I'm not a fucking mind reader. (Just kidding, I am. I knew they were going to ask for separate checks but brought them one so I could watch them freak out).

Do you live in Vegas?

- A lot of people assume that I live somewhere else, like Arizona, and drive here everyday. No, really... they really think that.

Do you like your job?

- Well obviously I love it, I'm smiling right?

Aremez said...

"Is (random item) good?"
Reminds me of something I hear a lot at my job, but it's usually along the lines of, "So, what's your best camera?" Really hate that question because the camera that's good for one person is too much camera for the next. I have a very hard time not answering by pointing at the most expensive camera we carry($897.00 before the state sales tax and you have to buy a case and memory card as separate items, no combos here.) Wonder what people think I gonna say sometimes.