Friday, April 8, 2011

Guest Post: I'm a mother, I squeezed a little turd out of my cunt so I'm entitled to act like both!

Today's guest post is from DMT. Ah, mothers. If you'd like to be added to the guest post queue, please send me an e-mail at slightlycranky at

A woman came sat down and started chatting with a friend while her son ran loose
in the cafe (probably wired on coke and sweets) until he threw up. She continued to chat
away ignoring the fact that the contents of his stomach were all over the floor while we
mopped it up and then left without buying anything or so much as an apology

She came in again later at the tail end of the lunch time rush, the place was blitzed nearly
every table needed clearing because everyone left at once and we were low on cups and
plates. She was rude to me at the till while I took and prepared her order, I was already pissed
off at her for earlier but the way she spoke to me with contempt as if I were a lower life form
and the fact that she was a cheap bitch ordering one tea and a hot water so she and her friend
could share the same tea bag and only pay for one tea had me at boiling point

She then stood around the corner at the cutlery tray (where I couldn't see her) for five minutes
while I was serving more customers before storming down to me demanding "Is it possible to
get some CLEAN spoons?" I couldn't have cared any less about her by then and said without
turning my attention from my current customer "My coworker (who was working her ass off btw)
is washing a load in the dish room they'll be out soon" She stomped away and waited to attack
her when she came. She grabbed a hand full of spoons off her and ranted "Gimme some of
those before you set them down this place is a filthy kip as usual" (bullshit it was our first time
serving her we'd never seen her before). That was a big mistake because that woman on the dish
is close to retirement age and takes no shit from anyone she said "If its always filthy why do you come
here, and just so you know we don't keep a filthy cafe customers make it filthy some put dirty spoons
in with the clean ones and others let their kids run around puking all over the place" The bitch was
left gobsmacked, by the looks of it it was the first time anyone gave her a dose of her own medicine
and it didnt taste too good!


SkippyMom said...

Bravo to your coworker. Some people just need to be [verbally] smacked upside the head for a little bit of karmic realization.

Great guest post.

Mountain Mama said...

Hell to the YEAH!!! I sooo wish I could've seen that go down.
After many years working in restaurants and dealing with rude customers, it would've been GRRREAT to see one of them put in their proverbial place. Cheers to your coworker. I love a take-no-shit type of attitude and think we should all try our hardest to develop one! :D

Anonymous said...

Just the title of this post alone cracked me up!

JoeinVegas said...

Sorry you don't all get to talk back to the obnoxious customers.

DMT said...

Oh great! Thanks for posting my story I'm glad you thought it was worth posting.

The coworker I mentioned is an absolute legend she should have been fired a few times over laying out verbal ownage. She's not an irritable person she just comes from a more down to earth time were people didnt have their heads up their own holes and being rude to other people was not acceptable regardless of who they were. Anyway I think one of the reasons she's still with us is because she is so damn lovable, a few of us call her our work mammy.