Wednesday, October 7, 2009

I'm no meteorologist ....

but I'm pretty sure it's raining bitches. (And I can't find a clip of that!)

Okay, maybe not exactly raining, but there were two horrible bitches tonight. The first came in with her husband and daughter. They're semi-regulars, and the husband is always nice as can be. The little girl is always sort of whiny ... and the mother is a total goddamn hag. She's mean to her daughter; never makes eye contact with her server; never says please or thank you; never says hello; and just snaps out her order.

Tonight they ordered a chip and dip appetizer before their dinner, which I rang in promptly. However, we had four servers on the floor and the place had just filled up again, so it did take maybe three minutes longer than usual. They were sitting at table 11, and one of my coworkers was at table 10 next door. I delivered their appetizer, and my coworkers stopped me on my way back to the kitchen. Apparently, right before I walked up with the appetizer the woman said quite loudly, "Didn't I fucking tell her chips and dip?"

Later, when I checked on how their dinner was, she said "we're fine NOW" as if I'd forgotten something. She didn't eat most of her dinner, as always; and as always they left a ten percent tip. It's so strange to me that her husband, who's so very nice, would put up with her acting that way in public.

The second bitch was a few hours later. I had a table of four, and I also had a three, a two, another two, a five, another two, and I think a three. We'd just cut to closers, which can be a hectic time. In this particular instance, three of the four entrees went out. The fourth was left in the window--but somebody discarded the ticket for the order, so nobody knew where the fourth plate was supposed to go. I saw it there, but I thought it was the start of the table at the top of the screen, which had an identical item.

A few minutes later I went by my four-top, which was in a sort of separate area from the rest of my tables. My fellow closer was standing at the table while one of the guys checked how his steak was cooked; nobody appeared to have eaten; I had no reason to think anything was wrong. So imagine my surprise when I asked how things were and was informed by the wife that "there was like a ten minute wait between the entrees!"

Oh, how I love the customer exaggeration. Thirty seconds becomes a minute; a minute becomes five; two minutes becomes ten. I apologized for the "wait", and asked if I could bring them anything else. The wife sort of snorted and leaned her forehead against her hand as if she just couldn't stand this. "Well, we're going to need some boxes," and she waved her hand over the table before covering her face again.

Oooookay. So I bring the boxes, which they predictably didn't use. The woman wouldn't look at me or answer me the rest of the meal, even when I addressed her directly and with a smile. Everybody else, including the guy whose steak had actually been delayed, was just fine. Bitch.

Despite the bitches, it was actually a good night. I got there at five, and had a seven table section (incredible!); within half an hour it had filled up. I got a rotation and a half in before the first rush ended; then we had another rush after first cuts, and another when we cut to closers. I left with $120 tonight after tip out and dinner. People were generous for the most part, and I was kept busy until the end.

In the end, I made $17/hour tonight in tips. I'm okay with that!

8 comments:

The Veteran Server said...

Yeah, customer exaggeration is so entertaining... in that frustrating, want to pull your hair out by the fistful way, lol! Good job on the $120 night! We were absolutely dead as a doornail yesterday, glad someone was making some cash. God bless!

Steven Nicolle said...

Customer exagerration is a crazy thing. Things always seem longer to people when they are waiting. Good job on the $120!

Mask said...

You say $17/hr like it's impressive. You are such a fucking loser. I guess it's to be expected from a minimum wage ogre like you.

Troll!!! said...

GET A REAL FUCKING JOB BITCH!
Seriously, do you like doing the work of a fucking teenager? GROW UP! Do something with your life...or are you just going to be a perpetual student, changing majors every few years. No wonder your dad is so embarrassed of you.

Blair said...

We have been waiting 15 minutes!!!!!! No, you have been waiting 3, morons.

supernovanator said...

I just love how the dumb ones have to comment... Those two probably don't have jobs anyway!

Good job on that $120! I made $11 last night...

purplegirl said...

Supernovanator, those "two" almost certainly one person who has nothing better to do than try to bother me. It's slightly hilarious, actually.

Sorry you and Vet Server had crappy nights! Although $11 is really the pits, I've had nights like that.

brit said...

Oh gosh I hate that. I feel like I always have to pay special attention to the "bitch" of the table, or else everybody else's experience is ruined too