Tuesday, April 19, 2011

Rednecks never fail.

I should know better than to get my hopes up when waiting on a redneck with a faint odor of chew about him, but tonight I got snowed. This man and his family came in for dinner; his wife was a bit bitchy, his daughter seemed like a typical snotty teen, but he was jovial and funny. He asked for toast instead of vegetables with his steak, and I had a total blonde moment and said we didn't have any. We've had garlic breadsticks for, like, a year now. We laughed together over my silliness, and I went to put their order in.

When his steak came out, there were no toppings at all on his baked potato. I didn't deliver their food, so it wasn't until I checked on them that I found this out. I apologized and joked about the manager being on expo, now I had a reason to give him a hard time. I then asked if redneck wanted another beer. His response was “maybe you can make the manager feel guilty so it's free!”

Now normally I don't find that kind of thing funny. At all. And normally I'd immediately know my tip was going to be non-existent. But then he laughed and said, “but I want one either way.” I actually liked this guy, so I did talk to Pot Smoking Manager and he comped the guy's beer. When I told the guy that, he high-fived me, and then I said something else that made him laugh and he gave me a fist bump. Even his wife was smiling by now.

So in the end, it was actually kind of a slap in the face to get a $2 “tip” on their $45 ticket.

11 comments:

SkippyMom said...

How did you not see that bus driving down the street and parking itself in the parking lot.

I am so sorry. A fist bump does not pay your rent.


Everyone should have canes. Like me. That way we can trip the douches.

Bagel Fairy said...

Hate how people think that being nice and personable is an acceptable substitute for a tip.

candice said...

Ouch. It's even worse when they say they loved you and will come back every week just to see you. Always wanna tell them and their two bucks to stay home instead!

john said...

how do these people come up with these paltry amounts? do they think they're supposed to tip like you tip a tax driver? are they so far removed from society that they don't even consider at least a ten percent tip?

littlebug said...

Oh I can do you one better. Last night I had a table that ran up a bill of $124 and I didn't even charge then for I think 4 of their drinks and which might not seem like much but it was a party of 10 the other one was drinking water, the other 4 were free kids drinks so I only charged them for ONE of their drinks. Our drinks are 2.00 each so their bill should have been 132 and why did I do this? Because one of them got the wrong steak, had to wait on the right one, then one of the retards said oh its my birthday and couldn't understand why I wouldn't give them a free desert when they wouldn't show me their ID. So I was trying to be nice. Wanna know what my tip was on this $124 check. $5.76 not even 10%. Yeah we will see if I ever try to be nice again. And they weren't rednecks either.

fuckmytable said...

It should have been your pleasure to serve them for FREE. You don't deserve to be treated nicely because you are a fellow human being; that was your TIP. Goodness.

I fucking hate people.

Under Cover said...

Some people are just cheap and stupid. The evening could have gone perfectly and you still would have gotten screwed.

DMT said...

No good deed goes unpunished so they say. You know what would have been better than a two dollar tip? a poke in the eye he may as well have done that. What an ingrate!

JennyAnn said...

Ouch. I definitely used to think that, but I had the ultimate redneck in a few months ago (Nascar shirt with holes, missing teeth, not quite clean) who ended up leaving me $45 on a $70 tab. Shame that the rest make the stereotype.

barista brat said...

what a jerk. i hate wasting smiles and humor on folks who are just going to screw you over in the end.

JoeinVegas said...

More fun reading about the idiots than the good ones. Thanks (but sorry you have to put up with them)