I didn't have a bad night at all, but I do have stories!
We'll start with the jackass. Toward the end of the night, a middle-aged couple came in. They had a water, a tea, and shared a half price appetizer. When they had their money out, I saw there were three stacks of coins.
"This is exact for the bill," the man shoved a five, a one, and a stack of coins at me. Then he slid the other coins to me. "And this is your tip. It all adds up!"
There was a "fuck you" on my lips right then for sure. I held it back somehow and scooped up the half pound of change. I didn't even bother to count it. I saw three quarters, a few dimes, and a bunch of goddamn pennies. I don't mind change, exactly, because I do have a coin jar. But to give me nothing but coins with the snide "it adds up" comment? Fuck off!
The idiot was just amusing. She sent her kid's macaroni and cheese back to the kitchen because she "didn't realize it was made with milk." What fucking planet are you from, lady?